Essay

MscGee 1

McGee 2

Sandria Sandora McGee (A58451384)

Due Date: September 18, 2018

Professor: Marohang Limbu

Project 1: Learning Memoirs

How the Death of my Father Changed my Life

Life wasn’t always great without my father in my life. Having the idea that my father would never come back was the worst feeling ever, and finding out that my father was murdered. When my father died, I wanted to commit suicide or killing the person who murdered my father. In this essay I will explain how my father death change my life. Comment by maonan xu: really attractive start Comment by Yuqing Zhao: I think this experience is very crazy.

My paper is divided into six different segments. First, I will talk about the last memory I had with my father. Second, I will talk about the funeral and how seeing his body for the last time.Third , I will discuss how my behavior was in school after my Comment by Yuqing Zhao: segments

father death. Fourth, I will tell you about the different men in my life. Then, explain the emotional feeling I had. Finally, I’m going to talk about high school my senior year. Comment by Yuqing Zhao: man

Last Memory of my Father

December 25, 2006 was the best Christmas ever, not knowing this would be the last christmas with my father. Waking up with so many gifts over the christmas tree, and seeing my father there greeting me and my siblings with “MERRY CHRISTMAS”. Laughter and joy celebrating christ and being with each other. My father was a great man, everyone knew his name. Everyone call my father “Bear” but his real name was Todd Edwards Jr. My father and mother work everyday, but my father get off earlier than my mother. My dad cooked us dinner, he cooked fried chicken and chili the last meal he cooked for me and after dinner we will play on our hockey table that we got for Christmas. I really think my father knew he was going to die, because the days before his death was the best days with him in my life. Unfortunately , four days after Christmas, my father was murdered. Comment by Khalid Yousif Alhammadi: my body got shudder when I read last 3 sentences Comment by Yuqing Zhao: I feel so sad that I read this content. Comment by maonan xu: really toughing

Todd Edwards Jr’s Funeral

December 29, 2006 my father was robbed and murdered, leaving four daughters and one son on the way. The night of December 29, 2006 I was at home with my siblings and my older cousin Quetta(babysitter), waiting for my father to come home. We waited so long, we went to sleep but my mother woke me up, crying telling me my father was dead. Worst feeling ever to get the news that the man, that you called father was dead. We didn’t go to the hospital because it was too painful for us.

Me and my sibling spend the whole week at my uncle Tyrone house, due to my family getting the funeral organized. January 6, 2007 was the day on the funeral, looking at my father body for the last time. At the funeral I cried so much, my heart was broken into pieces. My father was never coming back, I couldn’t play with the hockeyr table with him no more or he couldn’t cook for me. Seeing the casket close with my father in there was the worst feeling ever. Comment by Yuqing Zhao: I want ro give you a hug.

Behavior in Grade-School

Going back to school after my father death was not easy, trying to look happy was impossible. Going back to school after my father death was not easy, trying to look happy was impossible. My teachers called my mother everyday about my behavior. Really don’t know why my behavior was so bad, I was so upset that my father wasn’t going to pick me up from school or be there when I came home from school. One day I had a mandatory parent meeting with my mother and teacher. Hearing the teacher complain about me to my mother and seeing the disappointment on my mother face I knew, my behavior had to change. From first grade through fifth grade my behavior decrease I wasn’t getting in trouble, but when I got into middle school my behavior changed, my grandfather(my father’s dad) died. My grandfather died on my 13th birthday and the feelings was coming back.

The Different Men in my Life

Not having my father around was hurtful, I didn’t have a male figure in my life. My mother had different men around us and I didn’t like that because none of them was my father. I was always mean to her boyfriends, I didn’t like none of them, and one day she told us she was pregnant. My heart was broken because she moved on, why she couldn’t stay single like the others widows.Then couple years later she got married and I didn’t care about the marriage. My mother got married to a name that wasn’t my father, I was so upset because she got married. Couple years going by and they’re still married, I started to build a relationship with my step-father. He was a great stepfather but then they got a divorce. First it was my father, then my grandfather, and now my step-father.

Emotional Feelings was Coming back

The one you love is gone , and can’t come back. The feelings that I had when I was six years old is coming back. Again I had the mindset to kill myself or run away because my father was gone and I missed him so much. I was at the age of thirteen wanted to kill myself, to be close to her father. My life wasn’t complete without him, I was daddy’s little girl. I had the knife in my hand, so close to commit suicide. But I don’t know what happened because next thing I know, I was still alive. But thinking to myself if I kill myself my mother would be upset to lose the father of her daughters and then lose her second oldest daughter, I couldn’t kill myself. Comment by Yuqing Zhao: missed Comment by Yuqing Zhao: that’s a not good behavior for your life. Comment by Yuqing Zhao: that’s true.

High Schooler with a new Mindset

As I enter Osborn High-School, with so much pain in my heart. My mood wasn’t crabby, I was just quiet and miserable. No one knew in high school my father was dead and I wasn’t going to tell them. Trying to stay focus in school, was my main goal. One day in 10th grade, I was getting bullied from some girls. One of the young lady said an inappropriate comment about my father. When she said that, I didn’t think about my action I just attacked her. And I was sent to the principal office, I didn’t get suspended. But my principal said “ she wanted me to talk to a counselor”, about what’s been going on. Speaking with the counselor wasn’t easy, it took me couple of months to really express my feelings. Communicating with the counselor I talked about stuff, that I don’t even discuss with my family. The meeting we had was fun and some were sad, but I’m grateful to have a great mentor like her. Comment by Yuqing Zhao: deleted Comment by Jiale Wang: This is a really heavy essay to read, I don’t even know how to comment until here, I’m so glad that you can found a mentor like her to make you open your mind again, and now you write down your true feeling about all the things you have overcome, you are really a brave girl

Conclusion Comment by Khalid Yousif Alhammadi: The content that the essay inculde is really playing with my emotions, sensitive, and good writing as well. Good job Sandria! Comment by Sandria 2k18: Thank you.

My father death really changed my life, from first grade through twelfth grade. When he died December 29, 2006, my life had changed, and I wasn’t ready for this change. If I was still that little girl from first grade with the mean attitude, I wouldn’t have graduated with honors or even been a freshman at Michigan State University. Today I could have been dead, if I had the mindset of commiting suicide. Yes, I still get emotional about my father death but I had to “suck it up” and keep moving, my father is my guardian angel. Even though he’s not physically here, I know he’s here I spiritually. Comment by Yuqing Zhao: kept

Figure 1. “Me at my father grave site for his Birthday.” Figure 2. “And a Photo of my Father” Comment by Yuqing Zhao: good pictures and explanation.

Work Cited

Photos: From my Facebook profile (Sandria Mcgee)

Phone Interview with my grandmother (father’s mother)